Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Lick 49, 2008

  • Should a country celebrate ''bombs bursting'' in their national anthem?
  • It's not torture if the President says so?
  • Can a President declare torture legal?
  • Can a President declare BJs legal?
  • Can a President declare adultery legal?
  • Can a President declare perjury legal?
  • Should women who provide oral to the President in the oval office be viewed as enemy combatants undergoing harsh interrogation?
  • If Bill Clinton's brains weren't between his legs, would he have declared BJs legal?
  • If Bill Clinton's brains weren't between his legs, would adultery be an executive privilege?
  • If Bill Clinton wasn't a sodomite, would Monica Lewinsky have been an enemy combatant undergoing harsh interrogation?
  • Can a President declare toilet sex legal?
  • Can a President declare sex with underage government pages legal?

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Lick 48, 2008

  • Does the "billion served" on fast food restaurants remind you of a Twilight Zone episode?
  • Does the "billion served" on fast food restaurants remind you of the pie shop in Sweeney Todd?
  • Does fundamentalist preacher and anti-evolutionist Ted Haggard have a weekly conference call with George W. Bush?

Friday, March 14, 2008

Lick 47, 2008

Thursday, March 6, 2008

Lick 46, 2008

  • If you do not fear the shadow of death, will you fear it if the shadow is your own?
  • If you fear not the shadow of death, do you fear your own shadow?
  • If the legal age to drive a car is 16, is it unreasonable to wait 2 more years in order to have the right to drive a baby?
  • Is the shadow of death scarier when you cast it?
  • Do the Taliban get hotter virgins than Al Qaida?
  • Are the Christian angels hotter than the Muslim virgins?

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Lick 45, 2008

  • Will you learn faster if I spank your ass harder?
  • If I spank your ass harder, will you empathize harder?

Monday, March 3, 2008

Lick 44, 2008

  • Does the fact that no casinos have been blown up by gamblers angry at losing money mean gamblers are more sane and reasonable than the average Christian?
  • Have you experienced the anal rectification?
  • If I spank your ass harder, will you empathize harder?
  • If you divide the number of tards by the number of tards, do you have a tard remainder?
  • Does pre-anal make anal better?
  • If a pre-born baby is already a baby, wouldn't mothers and doctors opt to give birth earlier before to avoid c-sections?

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Lick 43, 2008

Should we have the right to own and drive tanks?
Should we have the right to own and put armored plating on our cars?
Should we have the right to bullet proof glass on our cars and homes?
Do men even look at Hillary Clinton as a woman?
Will Hillary Clinton stop claiming sexism once Obama makes her Vice President?
Should parents be allowed to torture their children?
Can I torture my neighbor if I believe he's supporting the dog that shit on my lawn?
Can I torture my neighbor if I believe he's withholding information about the dog that shit on my lawn?
Can I torture the neighbors' kids if I believe they have information that can lead me to the kids who left the flaming bag of shit at my door?
Is stupidity the cause of evil?

Friday, February 22, 2008

Lick 42, 2008

Does anybody actually know what?
Can a tongue licking a tongue be licked by the tongue it's licking?